Furious Angels: Chapter Two

December 17, 2008 at 2:05 am (Furious Angels) ()

Chapter 2


Scene 1:  Still on campus with Donovan and Diggory having a run-in.


Diggory:  (Talking to Donovan).  Who are you anyway?  You been following me or something?


Donovan:  I’ve heard a bit about you here and there.  You’re somewhat famous in my circle.


Diggory:  And which circle would this be?


Donovan:  A very secretive and dangerous one.  I wouldn’t push for more info on it.


Diggory:  (Annoyed).  What do you want?


Donovan:  I’ve got an offer for you.  A very tempting offer.


Diggory:  I’m not looking to transfer schools or anything.  I’m pretty content where I am now, thanks.


Donovan:  Hah, no, I’m not from any college admission boards, though you could call me a talent scout in a sense.


Diggory:  Sorry to disappoint, but I don’t play any sports.


Donovan:  I’m not that kind of scout, kid.  (Motions off frame).  I see you met Angela, huh?


Diggory:  Angie?  What about her?  (Extremely annoyed).  Been following her around, too?


Donovan:  No, we just happen to share the same line of work.


Diggory:  You a friend of hers or something?


Donovan:  You might say that.  Then again you might also say she’d like to see me dead, but the joke’s on her anyways.


Diggory:  I hardly imagine Angie wishing harm on anyone.


Donovan:  I’m not the nicest of guys, kid.


Diggory:  Really?  Because you seem sooo genuine.


Donovan:  Tell me, what’s your impression of Angela?


Diggory:  She’s…well she’s great.  She’s an angel.


Donovan:  (Grins).  I doubt you know the half of it…  I take it you’re in love with her or something then?


Diggory:  (Beyond annoyed).  I asked you a question.  What’s your business with me?


Donovan:  You’d said there were a couple of guys bothering you?


Diggory:  Yes, I did say that.


Donovan:  Elaborate for me.  Please.


Diggory:  There’s mainly one.  Goes by the name “Moose.”


Donovan:  (Interjects).  He sounds brilliant.


Diggory:  He came up with it himself.  His real name’s Steven but he prefers to slip comfortably into the typical frat-boy stereotype..


Donovan:  Sounds like a real winner.


Diggory:  For years he’s thought humiliating along me in front of his frat brothers was been the funniest thing since two guys walked into a bar.


Donovan:  What kinda stuff?


Diggory:  (Reflecting).  Started off small.  Tripping me on the playground, shoving me into lockers.  The usual.  Eventually it got bigger.  Smearing my name to friends of mine, finding out secrets I didn’t want getting out.  Eventually he found it most fun to harass me in front of potential romances.


Donovan:  Not much of the ladies man I take it?


Diggory:  I’m a bit shorthanded on the experience side if that’s what you’re getting at.


Donovan:  A hand-up never hurts once in a while.


Diggory:  (Snidely).  Charming…  (Shakes his head).  Things just got out of hand, but now I’ve got the chance to get back at these creeps on their terms.


Donovan:  Good.  Nothing resolves a vendetta quite like showing someone up in their own game.  What’s your plan?


Diggory:  His frat’s hosting a fighting tournament.


Donovan:  Fight club type crap?


Diggory:  More structure, but yeah, kinda.  Moose has been a self-proclaimed kung-fu master.  In actuality he’s an idiot, but he can throw a strong punch.


Donovan: Most frat-style can when they need to.


Diggory:  If I qualify high enough I’ll get a chance to fight him and a number of his closest associates.  That’s all I’d need to change some things.  Seeing him get pulverized on front of the only people he respects is sure to knock him back down to a human level of decency, maybe lower if I’m lucky.


Donovan:  You fight?


Diggory:  I know a bit.


Donovan:  Enough to hurt and humiliate these guys?


Diggory:  Hopefully so.


Donovan:  Well, I might be able to help you out in one way or another.  Here’s my card.  (Hands him a blank card).


Diggory:  (Donovan starts walking away as Diggory looks over the card).  This card’s blank.


Donovan:  It won’t be for long.  (Waves goodbye as he walks off).  Name’s Donovan by the way.  (Gone).


Diggory:  Strange guy…


Angela:  (Comes up behind Diggory).  Hey Dig.


Diggory:  Oh Angie, I thought you’d left.


Angela:  I did.  I got a weird feeling.  Woman’s intuition.  Who’s that you were talking to?


Diggory:  Don’t really know.  Some weird guy named Donovan.


Angela:  Donovan?  You sure you got that name correct?


Diggory:  Pretty sure.


Angela:  What did he want?


Diggory:  I don’t really know.  Said he knew you.  Does he look like a guy you know?


Angela:  Yeah…I know him…


Diggory:  Angie?  There something on your mind?


Angela:  Huh?  No, nothing.  (Smiles).  Nothing at all.


Diggory:  Hmh.  Just wonder-  (Looks down and sees the blank card.  Suddenly words appear.  “Don’t trust her…”  Angie…?  You’d never lie to me, would you?


Angela:  What?  Course not.  We’re friends.  Friends don’t lie to one another.


Diggory:  (The card displays more words.  “Then ask her about Daniel…”  Daniel?  Who’s Daniel?


Angela:  (Startled).  Wha…what?


Diggory:  (Looks up at her).  Who is Daniel?


Angela:  He’s


-Frame zooming into Angela’s eye.


-New scene with Angela standing with a man, (Daniel), both looking terrified as Donovan trudges closer to them.


-Daniel steps in front of Angela, pushing her behind him.


-Donovan slowly walks up, pulling his pistol-blade out, gently playing with it.


-Daniel grits his teeth.


-Donovan sinks the blade deep into Daniel’s stomach, causing Daniel to fall forward onto Donovan’s shoulder.


-Frame of Donovan’s face, an intensely terrifying and pained look in his eye.


-Frame of Angela backing away, terrified with tears beginning to roll down her cheeks.


-We zoom back out of Angela’s eye and back to the scene at hand.


Diggory:  (Merely the sound of his voice, somewhat unclear as Angela’s coming out of her flashback).  Angie…?  (Voice becomes clearer and sharp).  Angela?


Angela:  (Snaps back to the present and comes to her senses).  Oh?  (Shakes her head).  Diggory?  I’m sorry, I have to go.  (Starts to walk off).  Um…plan on meeting tomorrow?  Sound good?


Diggory:  Yeah.  You gonna be alright?


Angela:  I’ll be fine.  (Starts to leave).


Diggory:  You sure you’re alright?  You look extremely solemn all of a sudden and that’s not like you.


Angela:  I told you, I’m fine.  Work’s just been getting to me lately.  (Leaves).


Diggory:  (Looking the card over.  It’s suddenly blank again).  What is going on?


Scene 2:  New location in an alleyway.  Donovan is walking back and forth, humming to himself and looking rather pleased.


Donovan:  Hmm hmm hmm…wonder how long it’ll take?


Angela:  (Walking up, looking furious).  Donovan…


Donovan:  (Turns around to face Angela, smiling).  There she is…


Angela:  Did you approach my case?


Donovan:  (Patronizing).  Angie, I’ve got a lot of cases, which one-


Angela:  (Angry).  Stop the act and answer me; did you talk to Diggory?


Donovan:  Sure, I had a friendly chat with him, yes.


Angela:  Closers aren’t supposed to take clients away from each other; it’s the rules.


Donovan:  Don’t give me that “rules” bullshit.  I’ve done nothing wrong.


Angela:  Don’t lie to me.  You don’t need me angry with you right now.


Donovan:  So then give me the ultimatum…


Angela:  You know it well enough.  Butt out or else.


Donovan:  (Gets in her face and smiles).  Or else what?


Angela:  Or else-


Donovan:  What are you gonna do about it?


Angela:  I’m-


Donovan:  Go ahead.  Strike me.  Fight me.  Kill me.


Angela:  Closers are not to fight with each other.  It’s against the rules…


Donovan:  But you want to.  Soooo badly, don’t you?


Angela:  (Backs away, though still angry).  Stay away from Diggory.  Do you hear me?


Donovan:  So what?  You’ll tell God on me?  I’d be shocked if He ever decides to participate.  He’s left you alone Angie.  All alone.


Angela:  (Solid in her belief).  Not true.


Donovan:  I don’t see Him anywhere; do you?


Angela:  Be careful Donovan.  Once the conflict happens, your side will have a hard time managing ill-gotten recruits.


Donovan:  Hmph.  We’ll see about that.


Angela:  Quality, not quantity.  (Turns away, but turns back quickly to look Donovan straight in the eye).  Stay away from Diggory.  (Leaves).


Donovan:  Not if he comes to me.



Scene 3:  Classroom after hours.  The Professor is already there writing on the blackboard.  Moose is also there, waiting patiently at a desk.  Diggory is just walking in.


Diggory:  Professor, sorry, I got held-up just a bit ago.


Professor:  Sure, because I’m going to care why you’re not to this study session on time.


Moose:  You do realize that study sessions in college are utter bullshit, right?


Professor:  I’m old-fashioned.  Some methods just work best.


Diggory:  I don’t mean to contradict you, especially since you’re the one capable of inflicting stronger assignments and all, but study sessions, especially when talking about two college-aged guys, are sorta worthless.


Professor:  Yes, but sustained reflection works wonders.  I’m a theology professor after all; I’ve always had an affinity for reflection periods.  Time-out and whatnot.


Diggory:  So we’re getting punished like children?


Professor:  In so many words, yes.  You’re grounded to this room until morning.  Just the two of you.


Moose:  (Jumps up, angered).  Horse shit!


Professor:  Hey, it’s that sort of crap that got you in this mess.  So study hard, or fail my class.  Sound fair?


Diggory:  No.


Professor:  Good.


Moose:  What are we supposed to do for breakfast and stuff then?


Professor:  Start a club or something, I don’t care.  Just don’t kill each other before I get back.


Diggory:  What about other classes?


Professor:  I checked with them already.  They won’t miss you.  You don’t seem to participate any more in their classes than you do in mine.


Diggory:  Fantastic.


Professor:  Keep the point of this exercise in mind gentlemen.  You’re supposed to reflect and learn something.  Good night.  (Leaves).


-Diggory and Moose look at each other, uneasy for the night.


Scene 3:  Angela walks alone as the streetlights begin to come on for the evening.


Angela:  (VO narration).  I keep getting the most unsettling feelings.  This isn’t like me at all.  I knew the stakes when I agreed to tackle this one.  Diggory was a high priority case.  He’s incredibly important in some way.  I’ve handled important cases before, though.  Why does this one have me so worried?


Thug 1:  (A few thugs are mugging and possibly worse to a helpless woman).  Now now, is you stop struggling this could all go a lot easier for everyone involved.


Woman:  But I didn’t do anything to any of you!  Please!


Thug 2:  Oh you hear that?  She ways she didn’t do anything.


Thug 1:  Yeah, I hears it.  But she was deciding to be sooo provocative as she wandered by; it was almost like she was tempting us to grab her.  Why you think that is?


Thug 3:  Maybe she doesn’t get no love at home?


Thug 1:  Is that it hon?  No love from home?


Woman:  (Very terrified).  No no!  It’s nothing like that!  I’m loved just fine!


Thug 1:  Oh, so you’re saying we’re not worth your love then?  Or not worth any love atall?  Huh?


Woman:  I didn’t mean it like that!


Thug 2:  Oh I think she did.


Thug 1:  I agree.


Thug 4:  (Pulls out a knife).  Enough clever wordplay, I say we just split her open and leave ‘fore anyone starts to miss her.


Thug 1:  Be an awful shame to have her go without one last little thrill though, eh?  (Makes to unzip his pants).


Woman:  (Screams and struggles to break free).  No!  Please no!  (The thugs keep laughing).


Angela:  (Stepping forward from the shadows).  I don’t think any of you really want to do this.


Thug 1:  (All attention suddenly turns to Angela).  Oh ho ho, look what we’ve got here boys.


Thug 2:  Looks like whats we’ve gots her is a missus hero-type.  Of the female variety of all things.


Thug 1:  Well isn’t that darling?


Angela:  Let that poor girl go and just go home.  I don’t want any trouble, she surely doesn’t want any trouble, and I promise you, you all don’t want any trouble.


Thug 4:  Sorry girly, this was business that didn’t concern you.  (Walks over to her).


Angela:  Step away from me, now.


Thug 4:  You gonna make me?


-Angela closes her eyes for a moment and bows her head.  Thug 4 walks right up to her.  Angela opens her eyes again, they’re glowing white.  A gust whips through the area, stirring up newspapers and debris.


Thug 1:  Hey what the hell is she?!


Thug 4:  Don’ matter none as long as she bleeds…


-Thug 4 makes to thrust his knife on Angela.


-Angela makes a quick movement and grabs the knife from Thug 4’s hand, holding it off to the side.


-Thug 4 looks perplexed.


-Angela flexes her arm as the knife melts into white rose pedals and get whipped away with the gust, swirling around as they fly high into the air.


Thug 2:  Hey I ain’t never seen nothin’ like that afore!


Thug 1:  Me neither!


Angela:  (Her voice is affected and more impactful).  Please, let the poor girl go.


Thug 2:  Yeah yeah, sure sure.  (He lets go of the woman.  She makes to run for Angela).


Thug 4:  No, you ain’t running this show!


-Thug 4 grabs at the woman.


-Angela tilts her head, throwing Thug 4 against the wall with mind-force alone.  He slouches, dazed.


-The woman rushes to Angela, the two instantly disappearing once they make contact.


Thug 1:  Uh…anyone want to tell me what just happened there?


Donovan:  (Walks into the alleyway tossing his pistol-blade from hand to hand).  I’d say a couple of fuck-ups messed with the wrong girl.


Angela:  (On a rooftop away from the alleyway.  She has the woman with her).  Are you alright?


Woman:  I…I think so…


-Donovan walks up to Thug 4 as he’s looking up from his sitting position.


Donovan:  Don’t give me that look.


-Donovan stabs Thug 4 in the eye, then pulls the trigger, blowing the rest of his head off.


-The other 3 thugs freak out and rush out of the alleyway and into the street.


Angela:  Did those men hurt you?


Woman:  I’m…I’m okay.  I’ll be okay.


Angela:  I hope so.


-As the thugs run into the street, a dumpster is shot forward, rolling over Thug 2 and smearing him onto the street.


Donovan:  C’mon now; where you fellas goin’?


Angela:  I want you to get yourself to a police station.  File a report.  Would you like me to take you there?


Woman:  N-no, please.  (Throws her arms around Angela, hugging her and instantly breaking down and weeping).  Thank you…thank you…!


Angela:  It’s okay.  I didn’t want to see a good person hurt.


-Donovan walks out of the alleyway holding his pistol-blade.


Donovan:  You know you guys aren’t being much fun?


-Donovan shoots Thug 3’s feet off.  He falls down and clutches at Thug 1’s pant legs.


Thug 3:  Please!  Don’t leave me!


Thug 1:  G’ere off!  Leggo you douche-bag!


Donovan:  Now now, abandoning your dear friend like that?  Tisk tisk.  Simply appalling.


-Reaches out and grabs Thug 1’s face.  He swings his pistol-blade around and slices his forehead skin, then rips back and tears most of his face off.


-Thug 1 screams and falls backwards, trying to scurry away.  He begins instead to just writhe in pain.


Donovan:  Hmm, rape’s a heavy stain to bear on one’s soul, innit?  I can see you’re damn-near covered in filth.  (Stomps on Thug 1’s face, ending his life).


Angela:  Tell me, what is your name sweetie?


Woman:  It’s…it’s Candi.


Angela:  That’s a cute name.  Did your mother name you that?


Candi:  No…it’s the name my pimp calls me…  (Angela’s eyes go wide).


Donovan:  (Pulls out a rag and starts cleaning his foot off).  And you my non-footed friend, you care to tell me why you thought it’d be a good idea to piss off my friend Angela back there?


Thug 3:  (Panting heavily and wiggling his gnarled stumps of feet).  We were, hah, hah, we were just doing what we do best!


Donovan:  And what would that be?


Thug 3:  Hah, hah, we were-


Donovan:  And let me point out that if the answer is anything along the lines of “Muggin’ and murderin’” it’d be mighty unwise to speak.


Thug 3:  Uh…


Donovan:  Hmm, that’s a shame.  (Shoots Thug 3 directly between the eyes).


Angela:  Your…your pimp?


Candi:  (Wipes some tears from her eyes).  Yes.  I know, I deserve as much in my line of work.  This isn’t the first time it’s happened either, but it’s comforting to know that I have a guardian angel looking out for me.  (Hugs Angela again and begins crying once more).


Angela:  Yeah…


Donovan:  (Standing in the middle of the mostly darkened street, cleaning his pistol-blade).  With people like this around I almost can’t help but look like the good guy.


Angela:  (Walks out from the alleyway, rubbing her face).  Ug, it just doesn’t get any easier…  (Donovan looks over at her as she walks out.  She looks up and Donovan is gone.  She finally sees the remains of the thugs and nearly throws up).  Oh God…


End of chapter 2



  1. The King of Zing said,

    The end scene was AWESOME!!! I love the hardcore version of Furious Angels so much! I almost would tell you to make it even more graphic and adult… Even at times when there is no fighting, because yeah, that is some badass stuff… Someday if you actually make this into a comic book or series or live action thing or whatever nerds all over the world are going to be wanting replicas of Donovans Bladed Gun to complete their elaborate costumes for geek conferences of all types! lol. But seriously, that was cool to read… and the girl being a whore and Angie being a little turned off by it… Almost as if she almost regretted helping her was very intriguing as well… But on another note… Chris… a teacher forcing two students to just sit in a room all night? In college? THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN and it is literally unbelievable… So yeah, I would just say that maybe you should change that… I don’t know to what exactly, but definitely not that… Anyways, cool chapter overall though.

    • eclipsestar said,

      That’s probably the one biggest aspect of the entire Furious Angels script that I’m having trouble with the most. I need the two characters to have to share a night together, and I need a reason for other aspects of the plot to progress, (Chapter Three is completely new by the way), but I just can’t figure out how to do it. I did eliminate the idea of it being detention since that’s less believable, but I’m still not satisfied with the current explanation. I’ll have to brainstorm some more. Any suggestions?

  2. The King of Zing said,

    Dude… check out my comment for chapter 3! I had a great idea for what you could do about the whole detention scene thing!

    Also, one last thing I wanted to point out about this chapter is the fact that I love how for some reason Donovan decides to kill the would be rapists! Why does he do it? Is there some good or honor in him? I love the questions that it brings up… and in a way it is almost like without them maybe even knowing during this scene Donovan and Angie team up in a way… Crazy and very cool.

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