Eclipse Star: Genesis Chapter Three

September 27, 2008 at 1:53 am (Eclipse Star: Genesis) ()

Eclipse Star: Chapter Three

“The New Recruits”


Recap:  In a moment of clumsiness, Chris bumped the stand holding the Eclipse Star, knocking it off and causing a chain reaction that has devolved into chaos.  While the high schoolers all ran around like idiots with the alarms going off, Syrus took action in the basement and knocked out the museum security, including destroying the power grid for the city block, turning off all power.

At this point, two of Syrus’ men made their way to the room with the Eclipse Star and immediately attempted to shoot Chris, trying to take the Eclipse Star from him.  Thinking fast, Austin and Kyle were able to take out one guard and keep Chris alive, but four more soldiers have shown up and as Chris huddles behind the Eclipse Star’s pedestal for cover, the small gleams of light coming in from the museum’s windows provide little hope for the grim circumstance.


Soldier 4:  Open fire men!  (The four soldiers pull their rifles to hip height and start firing at the pedestal Chris is hiding behind.  The soldier responsible for shooting his partner is now just watching as confused as the rest of Chris’ friends, all of whom are hiding behind various other exhibits).


Chris:  Will someone do something already?!


Derek:  Why do I always save his skin…?  (Shakes his head from behind his hiding place to the right of the soldiers and eventually stands up).  Hey, anyone wanna give me some much needed attention?!


Soldier 5:  Who’s that?!


Soldier 3:  Don’t know, kill him too!  (Both start firing at Derek, who ducks back under his cover).


Soldier 2:  Syrus said minimum casualties…minimum…


Soldier 4:  (Hits Soldier 2 in the face with the butt of his gun).  Why don’t you shut up, huh?


Chris:  (Seeing that the soldiers have briefly stopped firing at him, he looks out from behind the pedestal and makes a rush towards the group of soldiers now firing at Derek).  Just leave us alone already!  (Rams his shoulder into the nearest soldier and forces him to lose his balance, causing him to fall into another two soldiers, knocking them down.  The fourth gunman turns around with the barrel of his rifle aimed squarely at Chris’ head).  Ohh…dammit…


Derek:  (Jumping up from his position.)  Punch him or something stupid!


Chris:  (With Derek’s sudden outburst having distracted the untrained assailant, Chris punches the soldier in the gut as hard as he can, discovering that he is wearing some heavy armor, leaving Chris holding his hand).  Ahhhh…  (The soldier turns again to face Chris while the other three have sorted themselves out and managed to get to their feet).  No…(Grabs the rifle and points it away from himself).…more…(Elbows the soldier in the chin).…guns!  (Pulls the rifle away from the recruit and starts shooting the ground near the other soldiers’ feet).  Drop your weapons, now!  (Panting now that he’s momentarily stopped firing).


Soldiers 4, 5, and 6:  (All look at each other).  No.  (Hold up their guns again).


-Danny and Willy run up from behind the three attackers, jumping at them, and kick two of them in the back as hard as they can with both feet.  The two they kicked fall face-first onto the ground, their guns sliding across the room.  The unharmed gunman opens fire on Chris, who grabs hold of the soldier he elbowed and uses him as a shield.


Chris:  Come on guys!  A bit more teamwork’d be appreciated!


-Clinton runs out from his hiding place and slides across the floor, picking up the discarded rifles.  He hurriedly aims and starts shooting with both weapons at the last soldier’s legs, quickly taking him down.


Chris:  (Nods).  Now that is hardcore.  (Throws down the unconscious soldier he was holding along with the gun he had taken from him).


Kyle:  (Kyle is now wearing most of the suit of armor and brandishing a broadsword).  Chris.  Take this.  (Tosses him a katana from the nearby exhibit).  Might come in handy if more terrorists show up.


Chris:  (Catches the sword).  Way to stay positive.  (Swings it like the nerd he is, enthralled by the chance to use a real sword).  And excellent choice there King Arthur.


Willy:  (Hops on the back of the soldier he knocked down and punches him in the face, leaving him unconscious.  Danny does the same to his soldier).  What next Chris?


Derek:  (Coming out from hiding).  We need to regroup and prepare for more.


Willy:  (Pulls out quite an impressive pocket knife).  Please tell me that you’re not acting like the leader here.


Derek:  I am damn well suited to be the leader and we all know it.  (Walks over to another weapon exhibit and pulls a pair of sai from the wall).  So who’s with me?


Danny:  (Blinks, confused).  You didn’t do anything though.


Derek:  I distracted the gun-toting madmen long enough to keep them from turning Chris into a heap of bleeding flesh.  (Flips a sai around in his hand).  Clinton, use the guns you’ve got and take a crouched position over in the corner.  (Points his orders as he says them).  Austin, stand defense at that archway, Danny, you do the same over there, Willy, the archway across from his.  (People are reluctantly taking his orders since no one else is giving any).


Austin:  (Picks up a pole from the floor and walks over to Derek).  This whole situation is getting pretty heavy, but man, how exciting!


Chris:  Not exactly the words I’d use to describe it…


Derek:  Chris, help me drag these guys out of the way.


Chris:  Sure.  (Rushes over to help Derek move the fallen soldiers).


Kyle:  And I should be doing what?


Derek:  Go find the girls and make sure they’re okay.


Lindsey:  (Peeking up from under some tables she’s tipped over for protection).  We’re okay.  Leena’s a bit spooked but we’re okay.  (Thumbs-up).


Leena:  Oh course I’m spooked!  I’m positively terrified!  We’re being shot at with assault rifles!  Why shouldn’t  I want to curl up and cry?!


Lindsey:  Like I said, Leena’s fine.


Derek:  Good, stay there, you’ll only get in the way if more-


Soldier 8:  (Runs in with another soldier).  Hey…what’s going on…?


Kyle:  These guys need new dialogue.


Derek:  Attack plan commence!  (Runs at the soldiers).


Chris:  What attack plan?!  (Follows his lead and runs towards the soldiers).


-Clinton starts shooting at the two soldiers.  They react by rolling out of the way.  The soldiers in turn start shooting at Chris and Derek who also respond by rolling in different directions.


Soldier 10:  (Runs in from the archway guarded by Austin).  Guys, I heard gunfire, what’s- (Austin trips him with the pole and thoks the other oncoming soldier in the face, flipping him onto his back and knocking him out.  Danny, being nearest to Austin, runs up and kicks the first soldier in the face, knocking him out as well).


-The other two soldiers with guns fire around the room madly trying to hit anyone.  Willy flips his knife in his hand and throws it at one of them, hitting him in the shoulder.  He yelps and drops his gun.  Clinton continues to provide limited cover fire, more afraid of hitting one of his friends than the other guy with the gun.


Soldier 7:  Ag, dammit!  (Pulls the knife from his shoulder and throws is back at Willy who’s trying to rush up at him.  It hits him in the leg, causing him to stumble.  Chris dives at Willy’s attacker and hits him in the side of the head with the hilt of his katana).


Kyle:  (Kyle runs at the guard still firing and pulls his sword up above his head in attack position).  For Excalibur and Camelot!  (The soldier shoots him in the chest but Kyle is unharmed due to the chest-plate armor he’s wearing.  Kyle reaches the soldier and slaps him across the face with his sword, knocking him out but leaving him relatively unharmed.)  Heh, didn’t actually expect that to work…  (Shakes his head, laughing).  Putz.


Chris:  Derek, we’d better move these guys out of the way, too.  (Grabs the unconscious guy next to Willy and starts dragging him).  Hey Willy, you okay?


Willy:  (Cringes as he pulls the knife from his leg).  My leg hurts like a mother but I’ll be okay.


Lindsey:  Chris, let me help you with these guys.  (Comes out from under the table and helps Chris drag the unconscious soldiers into a pile).


Derek:  I thought I told you to stay hidden.


Lindsey:  I think I’m old enough to make decisions for myself.


Derek:  Doesn’t matter how old you get, you’re still a female and aren’t fit for combat, now go hide!


Lindsey:  No!  If any more of these people attack us I’m fighting, too!


Chris:  Lindz, I don’t like agreeing with Derek but I don’t wanna see you get hurt.


Lindsey:  Don’t tell me you’re actually gonna listen to him!


Chris:  I just…this is dangerous and…


Lindsey:  (Grabs a pair of elbow blades from yet another exhibit).  Save it.


Leena:  (Freaked out).  Don’t be stupid Lindsey!  Get back here and take cover!


Clinton:  (Jogs up to the group in the middle of the room, still holding the two guns).  Derek, should we get in the same positions as last time, ‘cause it didn’t seem to work too well.


Derek:  It would have worked better if we had all listened to my original plan, now just give Leena one of the guns and we’ll regroup and re-plan.


Chris:  Um, guys?  What should we do about him…?  (Points towards Syrus).


Syrus:  Mere children…?  (Looks around at his soldiers all lying on the ground).  They were all beaten by mere children…?


Kyle:  Who the hell is this guy?  Mel Gibson?


Derek:  Hah, he doesn’t even have a gun.  We can take him, no problem.  (Flips a sai in his hand and laughs).


Syrus:  I will ask this only once:  Who has the Eclipse Star?


Chris:  (Stepping forward).  I do.


-Syrus motions for Chris to hand it to him.


Chris:  No…  (Takes a step backwards).  You can’t have it.


Clinton:  (Cautious).  Maybe if you just give it to him we can end this whole thing.


Chris:  No, something about him doesn’t feel right…


Derek:  You and your feelings…  Hey, black and gray!  (Points at Syrus).  That’s right, I’m talking to you!  We’ve dealt with your associates and you don’t even have a rifle, so why don’t you just walk away before we have to kick your ass, too?


Syrus:  Hmh.  (Clenches his fists).  Try me.


Derek:  (Rolls his eyes and laughs).  He’s really testing me today.  (Throws one of his sai at Syrus.  Syrus easily catches it).


Chris:  This guy definitely isn’t an amateur Derek, so don’t do anything stupid…


Derek:  Rrrrrr…charge the damned fool!  (Runs at Syrus who slaps him hard across the face, knocking him flying across the floor.  Syrus throws the sai he was holding at Derek’s pant leg, pinning him to the ground).


Austin:  Hiyah!  (Swings his metal pole at Syrus’ face.  Syrus catches it with one hand and takes it forcibly from Austin, then uses it to trip him.  He fancily spins the pole around and then smashes Austin in the face with it).


-Clinton runs at Syrus while firing his gun, though Syrus is unaffected by the bullets and just stands there glaring at him.  Clinton comes to a scared halt as Syrus jumps towards him, catching him under the chin with the pole.


-At this point Danny is trying to come around behind him for an attack.  Syrus simply swings around, hitting Danny in the side of the head.


-Kyle runs at Syrus from another angle with his sword swung up above his head.  He brings it down at Syrus who blocks it with the pole, knocks it out of his hands, then punches Kyle in the chest, leaving a dent in the bullet-ridden armor and sending Kyle flying back into the wall.


Syrus:  (Looks around the room, swinging the pole gracefully behind him and crouching in a fighting stance).  Would anyone else like to try?


Lindsey:  Just leave us alone!  (She also attempts to run at Syrus, pulling her elbow blades back in a position to strike.  Syrus holds the pole above his head ready to bring it down on Lindsey).


Syrus:  This is no way for a little girl to act.  (Smiles and brings his metal staff down hard with a loud clang, the sound of metal hitting metal).


Chris:  (He’s stepped in front of Lindsey with his katana countering Syrus).  Leave her alone…


Lindsey:  Chris, I-


-Chris kicks behind him, shoving Lindsey back.  Chris holds his katana shakily over his head as Syrus presses down with his pole, forcing Chris to one knee.  Chris pushes back but to no avail.


-Chris quickly rolls to one side and slashes at Syrus’ legs, who flips forward out of the way and turns around to hit Chris with the staff.  Chris blocks the hit with his sword but Syrus is already on the attack again and kicks Chris in the side of the head.  He throws the metal pole away and jumps on Chris, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pulling him off the ground.


Syrus:  Just give me what I’ve asked for.


Chris:  You want it so bad?!  (Pulls the Eclipse Star out of his pocket).  Then take it!  (Punches Syrus in the eye with the hand holding the artifact.  Syrus stumbles slightly and drops Chris who runs to the window and hurls the Eclipse Star out of it).  Yah!  (The Eclipse Star goes spinning out the window, arcing upwards with increasing speed.  It then flashes and disappears).  What in the…?  I didn’t expect that…


Syrus:  Damn!  You…!  (Sirens can be heard outside.  Car doors open and slam shut.  Heavy footsteps make their way into the museum and start climbing stairs).  This isn’t over…  (Shares one last intense stare with Chris and then fires an energy blast at the ceiling, blowing a hole in it.  He jumps through it and from there we lose sight of him).


Chris:  How strange…


-A large group of rifle-toting soldiers run into the room from all entrances and take a look around.


Soldier:  What’s going on?


-All of Chris’ friends groan.


Chris:  (Gets in a fighter stance although his legs are weak and he can barely stand).  If I have to, I’ll fight you all, too!


Soldier:  Calm down there tiger, we’re the good guys.


Chris:  Oh thank God.  (Falls to the ground).


Soldier:  (Runs up to Chris and helps him up while the rest of the soldiers go around helping the others who’ve been knocked to the ground).  Hey, you okay?


Chris:  I think I’ll be fine.


Soldier:  Don’t worry, you’re safe now.  The name’s Jack Voss.  I’m part of the Legion.  (Stands proud after saying this).  We’ll take it from here.


To Be Continued…



  1. avatarleo said,

    NO! Don’t listen that Jack-@$$! He’s a con-artist, just like that nut-case Montague he’s based off of.
    Sorry for swaring. It was just so convenient.

  2. The King of Zing said,

    This chapter seemed to go by fast… Maybe because of all the action… Not a bad thing, so yeah, fast is good sometimes. Once again I really liked your use of the Kyle character… very funny and entertaining. I like the repeated joke of the soliers always saying the same thing when they run in…. Though I know that we are supposed to suspend reality when watching movies or reading comics, I still feel that in a way the characters all suddenly become “fighters” way too quickly… I mean, I guess it makes sense because of the fact that later on they are all shown to have had special innate abilities and in a time of crisis they might have come out in a way, but I still feel like during this scene they should be more lucky than able… if that makes any sense. I feel that they should be way more awkward and untrained in their fighting ability… Especially Lindsey… She should not switch to such a badass so quick nor automatically know how to use blades. Just something I thought about when reading this chapter…. I still like it though, fun quick chapter with lots of funny moments and action. So yeah, good job overall.

    • eclipsestar said,

      I’m always afraid that everything seems too easy for the characters, especially in the beginning chapters. However, they aren’t all exactly warriors right off the bat. Though they take down ten armed soldiers, the soldiers in question are implied to be either very newly trained or hardly trained at all. Much of the problem the soldiers have is their dependancy on their guns, a fault Syrus points out prior to the big scene. The group manages to scrape by with luck and slight planning, though it doesn’t work perfectly. Willy gets his knife thrown back into his own leg and everyone takes a few lumps from Syrus. Lindsey doesn’t actually do any fighting of her own, she just rushes into battle as if she knows what she’s doing, though we don’t get to see whether she’d have held her own or not, a trend that Chris perpetuates repeatedly as the series progresses and leads to Lindsey’s main motivation for the series: Proving she can take care of herself.

      Anyway, after all that defending of my chapter, you’re right, they got too good too fast.

  3. The King of Zing said,

    Also, you always tell me that at least the last names of characters that you created mean something… So what does Voss mean in Jack Voss’s name?

    • eclipsestar said,

      Voss is a name that means “fox” and is meant as a nickname for a clever individual. Jack, being sneaky and manipulative, just seemed to be asking for such a name.

  4. The King of Zing said,

    Well, after looking back on it, you are correct. They all do take their bumps and do have some luck along with their makeshift planning. So yeah, I definitely see that now. I also forgot to tell you that I have always loved the part where Clinton slides across the floor and grabs the guns and begins to shoot…. totally badass and cool and funny in a way. Good times.

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